Sleeping With a Snoring Partner

Protect your own sleep tonight

• Use well-fitted foam or silicone earplugs; try several types to find a comfortable fit.
• Add white or pink noise, or a fan, to mask snoring.
• Try going to bed first, so you are asleep before the snoring starts.
• Ask your partner to roll onto their side if they snore on their back.
• Sleeping in separate rooms some nights is a legitimate choice. Good sleep for both of you can be better for the relationship than shared broken nights.

What can reduce the snoring

• Side sleeping: snoring is often worse on the back. Positional aids or a pillow behind the back can help.
• Avoiding alcohol and sedatives in the evening, which relax throat muscles.
• Treating nasal congestion and allergies.
• Losing weight if overweight.
• Stopping smoking.
• Getting enough sleep, since sleep deprivation can worsen snoring.

When snoring is a warning sign

Loud snoring can be a symptom of obstructive sleep apnea, in which breathing repeatedly stops or becomes shallow during sleep. Encourage your partner to see a doctor if you notice:

• Pauses in breathing followed by gasping or choking
• Snoring loudly nearly every night
• Daytime sleepiness or dozing off easily
• Morning headaches or high blood pressure

Sleep apnea is common, often undiagnosed and very treatable.

How to raise it kindly

Snoring is not a choice, and many people are embarrassed about it. Pick a calm daytime moment, focus on health and on both of you sleeping well, and offer to go to the appointment together. Recording a few minutes of snoring and any pauses on a phone can help a doctor.

Treatments the snorer might be offered

Depending on the cause, options include positional therapy, nasal treatments, custom oral appliances made by a dentist that move the lower jaw forward, and CPAP if sleep apnea is diagnosed. CPAP is very effective at stopping snoring and breathing pauses when used consistently. Surgery is an option for some people. Be wary of anti-snoring gadgets that make big promises without evidence, and ask a doctor before relying on one if sleep apnea symptoms are present.

Living with CPAP as a partner

Modern CPAP machines are quiet. Mask leaks can make noise, so a refitted mask often solves that problem. Many partners report sleeping better once the snoring stops.